Dear Cabana Boy From THIS POST,
You really perturbed my husband. I have to say, it was funny seeing him get his panties in a wad about you since our first and last meeting was, like, 8 months ago. And you were just serving me drinks. And you're gay. Oh, and you're not real.
I think it's in your best interest if you don't weasel your way into my dreams like that anymore. Thanks for your phenomenal service. Maybe someday the husband will accompany me on the beach and you can serve me again. And perhaps you can pull some strings and have Morgan Fairchild bring him beer.
Thanks for everything,
PS - I'm totally kidding, husband! Really! I am! I'll have him bring Diane Keaton.
PPS - I love you. I tease you because I love you. Wheaton's Law! Wheaton's Law!